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February 5, 2012

Book Review: Gods in Everyman by Dr Jean Shinoda Bolen

Book Review:

Gods in Everyman by Dr Jean Shinoda Bolen

Well, we’ve dealt with the female deities, so it seems only fair that we move on to the male.

Not that this book is exclusively for men, any more than Goddesses in Everywoman was exclusively for women. As Bolen herself puts it in her preface:

‘When I speak about gods in Everyman [sic], I discover that women often find that a particular god exists in them as well, just as I found that when I spoke about goddesses men could identify a part of themselves with a specific goddess. Gods and goddesses represent different qualities in the human psyche. The pantheon of Greek deities together, male and female, exist as archetypes in us all, although the gods are usually the strongest and most influential determinants of a man’s personality, as the goddesses are for women.’

Gods in Everyman: Archetypes That Shape Men’s Lives was published in 1989, four years after Jean’s book on goddesses. If you’ve read the latter ― or at least read my review on it ― you’ll recognise in the former the same psychological device of using myths that have endured over centuries to express and understand archetypes: patterns of behaviour that are common to all humans.

In the sequel, men (and women) are encouraged to explore different aspects of their personalities represented by several god figures: Zeus, the powerful, ruthless patriarch; intense Poseidon, ruled by turbulent waves of emotion; Hades, the mysterious introvert whose still waters run infinitely deep; the favoured son Apollo, logical, self-motivated and emotionally distant; charming, eloquent Hermes, the spontaneous adventurer and trickster; passionate Ares, the fierce lover and fighter; soulful Hephaestus, the absorbed, wounded creator; and Dionysus, the attractive, sensual ecstatic, ruled by intense instinctive highs and lows.

Through such knowledge, Bolen’s readers may again find greater control over unconscious patterns of behaviour hidden within themselves via various ‘Aha!’ moments of self-recognition.

I’ve enjoyed the insights both fully gleaned and half-spied in both of Bolen’s books on this fascinating subject, and know that I shall return to them time and time again for further psychological insight at future times of need, or simple curiosity.

But, while reading Gods, an unexpected ‘Aha!’ moment came that wasn’t a realisation about my personality, or someone else’s character, but concerned something broader about society that has niggled at me for years.

For, while I like to think of myself as an independent and enlightened woman, ready to stand up for my position and that of others against negative cultural and sexual stereotyping, I’ve always steered clear of labelling myself a feminist. Perhaps I missed the main drive of the movement, having been privileged enough not to have had to personally fight for my political rights as I grew up. Perhaps it’s in my Persephone nature to sit on the fence, to argue both sides, to withdraw from outright commitment, to live in the world of grey rather than choose to be black or white.

But, then again, perhaps it’s because I hate debates where some people seem to automatically polarise everyone into one camp or another, solely by virtue of their gender. Perhaps I feel the frustration of men who say, ‘But we’re not all like that.’ Perhaps I felt, but never had the right words to express what Jean says so simply:

‘In a patriarchal society, women do not fare well. But male stereotypes also hold power over men, limiting who they can comfortably be by rewarding some qualities and rejecting others.’

Perhaps this is a remarkably facile revelation to have. But then, isn’t that the beauty of revelation? When something that’s been churning around in the white noise of your brain for years suddenly clicks into place, shudders into focus as the right words reverberate in your head for the first time and you realise that this, for you, is the simple truth that you’ve sensed all along.

Sure, my moments of ‘Aha’ won’t ring true for everyone. But then, if Jean Shinoda Bolen’s books tell us anything, it’s that we’re all different. Even though, united in the enduring archetypes of humanity, we’re also fundamentally the same.

Rowena Roberts

:::

UD:BOOKS

Urban Deva loves books. In fact, we’d go as far to say we’re obsessed. So we thought it’d be a good idea to share the love and regularly recommend some of our favourites. We hope you enjoy them too.

October 19, 2011

Book Review: Goddesses in Everywoman by Dr Jean Shinoda Bolen

Book Review:

Goddesses in Everywoman by Dr Jean Shinoda Bolen

I picked this book up because I believe in the power of stories.

As a lifelong bookworm, I know their power to fire the imagination and feed me awareness and understanding of people and worlds beyond my own experience. As an advertising copywriter, I also know their power to help brands gain customers’ interest, loyalty and (yes) cash ― and perhaps create a more imaginative, creative, and stimulating working environment for their employees.

But the notion that certain stories, when properly analysed and applied, could have the power to help me better understand, handle, and help my self? Now, this was intriguing.

Goddesses in Everywoman: Powerful Archetypes in Women’s Lives explains complex theories of Jungian depth psychology in simple terms that the layman (or woman) can understand. At its core, it is a book about archetypes, which ― according to Carl Jung ― are innate psychic dispositions that can influence and explain universal patterns of behaviour, common to all humans. Such patterns are usually hidden within the unconscious; only by recognising them consciously via some kind of psychological breakthrough can we understand motivations and habits that influence us, and perhaps keep us trapped in a certain cycle of behaviour.

The author, Dr Jean Shinoda Bolen, discovered during her work as a psychiatrist and analyst that using figures from Greek mythology to personify these archetypes helped some of her clients achieve this moment of breakthrough ― or “Aha!” as she terms it ― when what was unconscious becomes conscious and can therefore be tackled.

Her straightforward analysis of myths that have endured over thousands of years reveals patterns of behaviour and character traits that we can still recognise, identify with, and learn from today, realising as we do the eternal truth that we are human, and therefore we are not alone in what we feel.

Bolen’s approach may be simple, but her analysis is far from simplistic. Each goddess analysed in the book is a pattern, not a personality; the author explains how an individual may contain many goddesses, some of which may dominate ― or ‘become active’ ― during different life phases, events, even times of the month.

Bolen also challenges traditional Jungian thought that polarised archetypes into masculine and feminine attributes, which were often regarded as out of place in the opposite sex. Bolen’s approach is more holistic and less stereotypical, seeing goddesses ― and indeed gods ― in both women and men.

I experienced many moments of “Aha!” during the course of this book. For there, entwined in the myths of Athena, was my grandmother: practical, efficient, keen on crafts and good with her hands, but not so good with her heart; a critical and disappointed mother who focused on failure rather than nurture. And there was my closest school-friend, a classic Demeter-type whose desire to be a mother was already deep-rooted when we first met, at the age of 11. There was my Artemis great-aunt, independent of spirit, protector of the young, traveller, and lover of just causes.

And, of course, there was me in my 20s, stuck in the cycle of eager-to-please, quick-to-deceive Persephone, swept up by the desires of others, rather than her own, so greatly did she fear disapproval and dislike. That was a pattern that took me a while to acknowledge, and try to overcome.

Still, this is not a book that wags the finger accusingly; rather, it seeks to give the reader hope. For among our ‘goddess-given liabilities’ also lie ‘goddess-given gifts’, which we can discover and nurture, and even use to challenge society’s stereotypes from a point of inner certainty and truth ― stereotypes that might otherwise stop us from being the best we can be.

In this way, Bolen believes our inner goddesses can help us to live our own personal myths, empowering us with “the possibilities of finding personal meaning through choices others might not encourage.”

I could quote this book all day. But then you might not read it for yourself. And you really should, if you have any interest at all in discovering more about yourself and about others, female and male.

It’s an interesting story, after all; one that continues to endure across thousands of years: the story of humanity.

Rowena Roberts

:::

UD:BOOKS

Urban Deva loves books. In fact, we’d go as far to say we’re obsessed. So we thought it’d be a good idea to share the love and regularly recommend some of our favourite books.

We’d also like to take this opportunity to thank Rowena Roberts for doing such a stellar job of our first official book review, and look forward to sharing more of her thought-provoking finds with you.

February 18, 2011

The Quickening

The Quickening


This morning (08:36 UT) saw the full moon, also known as the Quickening Moon. According to information sourced from Druid Network’s website, the Quickening Moon only comes once every four years. At each of these moons we review the past seven years:

“The reason for this is that every seven years we have renewed through regeneration every cell in our bodies. The new may be crafted by the instructions of the old, but change, healing, adaptation make significant alterations.

Spend time through this moon considering and writing a review of the past seven years, thinking about the physical changes that have happened in your life, and the emotional and spiritual journey that you have been walking. When you have done it, check what you retain in your life that is older than seven years. Is it necessary to keep it? How long is the visible and tangible trail you are leaving (dragging) behind you? Make sure that you release what can be released. Make sure you are living with as much freedom as you can.”

Elsewhere, however, February’s full moon is apparently always known as the Quickening Moon. Jeanette Leblanc on her blog, Crunchy (On the Inside), has this to say about  it:

“The full moon in February is known as the Quickening moon, it marks the official end of winter, and the quickening, the renewal of all things. While the skies are still grey, and the weather is cold, beneath the surface life begins to secretly stir. This moon phase is a time of abundance, ripening and completeness, heavy with fertility and female divinity. It is a time when the potential of all things begins to stir towards birth in spring, a time to work on our own inner power and confront personal truths in preparation for birth. This moon sheds enough light to help us see into our darkness, so that our energy can make its way to the surface to prepare for growth and healing.”

Regardless of whether it’s once every four years or every February, I find both of the above statements interesting. Just last night, during my regular four mile power-walk, I got the strange feeling something was afoot… but couldn’t quite put my finger on what: like the calm before the storm or something. It was cold and the sky was cloudy (so no viewings of the Aurora Borealis — boo), but nevertheless, despite straying no farther than the streets of my local village and neighbouring town, the feeling of anticipation and expectation was so palpable, it bordered on the eerie.

As a long-time outdoor exerciser I’ve grown particularly sensitive to the changes in the seasons. It’s so subtle, so imperceptible, however, that it’s nigh on impossible trying to explain to sedentary folk who spend their lives cooped up indoors in front of the telly that the quality of light or air has changed indicating a shift in the seasons and cycles of Nature — spring isn’t only marked by a gradual lengthening of the days.

So it made a lot of sense to me, this morning, reading about the Quickening Moon; because that’s exactly how I’d describe what I felt last night — a quickening. Change was quite literally afoot as I glanced down and spied crocuses, hyacinths, and other springtime flowers bursting forth in gardens and along verges.

The first quote feels particularly relevant, however, as I moved into my first house on Friday 13 February 2004 in what marked a new chapter in my life (although I didn’t see it like that at the time — I was heartbroken, depressed, and somewhat chubby around the edges). Being honest, I forgot all about this (the date I moved into my house) until I started writing this post. Scary how time flies. I’d split up with my boyfriend not long before Christmas (or rather, he split up with me) and just qualified as a life-coach. I had no idea what direction my life would take. All I knew was things had to change.

So it seems appropriate and timely for me, today, to reflect on my experiences of the past seven years, much of which I share at length in my book. Back then, I was a lost soul with no substance, no sense of self, no inner core. Didn’t know where I was headed, how life would turn out. I was trying my best to move forwards, but all the while my insecurities and unconscious wounds kept dragging me back, dragging me down. They were dark days. But something kept me going. God knows what.

So I’m rather hoping today’s Quickening Moon, these next seven years, marks a new phase in my life. Unlike the insecure lost soul back then, I’m ready for new challenges and adventures. Unlike the insecure lost soul I once was, I’ve found my footing, walk taller than I did back then. I just hope I have the strength, courage, and stamina to continue along this all-too-often precarious path, be true to my deep Self and fulfil my destiny with all the grace I can muster.

:::

One final note: I received an email this morning via my website. At first I wasn’t sure what to make of it, initially finding it creepy (stalker-ish, if the truth be told) and even mocking it on Twitter. (I think partly because I don’t know my father, so found it a little offensive — although I doubt the sender intended it to be.) But throughout the day I’ve kept going back to it, mulling over it, reflecting upon it. Now, I actually find it quite moving if I read it as poetry rather than prose; approach it in terms of its connotation rather than its denotation.

I’m descended from West African tribes-people who innately know there’s more to life than meets the eye. Let’s just say that I, and my family, have had more than our fair share of inexplicable and somewhat strange (for want of a better word) experiences over the years.

So last night, before I fell asleep, I had a chat with my ancestors, asked for some guidance on a particular matter that’s recently weighed heavy on my heart. More often than not, I receive feedback in the form of dreams; a song on the radio; an ‘out-of-the-blue’ comment from a stranger: which is why something tells me that, whatever the ego-oriented (read: conscious) motivations of the sender, there’s more to this message than meets the eye…

Whoever sent it please don’t answer this or say anything else — I just wanted to say, ‘Thank You’:

Thea, My Child,

~

You may not know me,

but I know everything about you.

Psalm 139:1

~

I know when you sit down and when you rise up.

Psalm 139:2

~

I am familiar with all your ways.

Psalm 139:3

~

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.

Matthew 10:29-31

~

For you were made in my image.

Genesis 1:27

~

In me you live and move and have your being.

Acts 17:28

~

For you are my offspring.

Acts 17:28

~

I knew you even before you were conceived.

Jeremiah 1:4-5

~

I chose you when I planned creation.

Ephesians 1:11-12

~

You were not a mistake,

for all your days are written in my book.

Psalm 139:15-16

~

I determined the exact time of your birth

and where you would live.

Acts 17:26

~

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Psalm 139:14

~

I knit you together in your mother’s womb.

Psalm 139:13

~

And brought you forth on the day you were born.

Psalm 71:6

~

I have been misrepresented

by those who don’t know me.

John 8:41-44

~

I am not distant and angry,

but am the complete expression of love.

1 John 4:16

~

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.

1 John 3:1

~

Simply because you are my child

and I am your Father.

1 John 3:1

~

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.

Matthew 7:11

~

For I am the perfect father.

Matthew 5:48

~

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.

James 1:17

~

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.

Matthew 6:31-33

~

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.

Jeremiah 29:11

~

Because I love you with an everlasting love.

Jeremiah 31:3

~

My thoughts toward you are countless

as the sand on the seashore.

Psalms 139:17-18

~

And I rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

~

I will never stop doing good to you.

Jeremiah 32:40

~

For you are my treasured possession.

Exodus 19:5

~

I desire to establish you

with all my heart and all my soul.

Jeremiah 32:41

~

And I want to show you great and marvellous things.

Jeremiah 33:3

~

If you seek me with all your heart,

you will find me.

Deuteronomy 4:29

~

Delight in me and I will give you

the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4

~

For it is I who gave you those desires.

Philippians 2:13

~

I am able to do more for you

than you could possibly imagine.

Ephesians 3:20

~

For I am your greatest encourager.

2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

~

I am also the Father who comforts you

in all your troubles.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

~

When you are broken-hearted,

I am close to you.

Psalm 34:18

~

As a shepherd carries a lamb,

I have carried you close to my heart.

Isaiah 40:11

~

One day I will wipe away

every tear from your eyes.

Revelation 21:3-4

~

And I’ll take away all the pain

you have suffered on this earth.

Revelation 21:3-4

~

I am your Father, and I love you

even as I love my son, Jesus.

John 17:23

~

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.

John 17:26

~

He is the exact representation of my being.

Hebrews 1:3

~

He came to demonstrate that I am for you,

not against you.

Romans 8:31

~

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.

2 Corinthians 5:18-19

~

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.

2 Corinthians 5:18-19

~

His death was the ultimate expression

of my love for you.

1 John 4:10

~

I gave up everything I loved

that I might gain your love.

Romans 8:31-32

~

If you receive the gift of my son Jesus,

you receive me.

1 John 2:23

~

And nothing will ever separate you

from my love again.

Romans 8:38-39

~

Come home and I’ll throw the biggest party

heaven has ever seen.

Luke 15:7

~

I have always been Father,

and will always be Father.

Ephesians 3:14-15

~

My question is…

Will you be my child?

John 1:12-13

~

I am waiting for you.

Luke 15:11-32

~

Love, Your Dad

Almighty God

:::

Thea is author of the inspiring memoir Running into Myself. Buy a copy from Amazon UKAmazon US or, better still, order a limited edition signed copy direct from her publisher here (also ships worldwide).

Thea’s personal journey is utterly compelling. I couldn’t put her book down. Thea manages to make Greek mythology not only understandable, interesting, and relevant to our lives today, but shows how it can be utilised as a tool for self development. She introduces ideas and ways of thinking that broaden your mind, and lights the way for others to follow.”

— Melinda Messenger (TV Presenter)

February 15, 2011

The Real Work (Rumi)

The Real Work (Rumi)

There is one thing in this world you must never forget to do. If you forget everything else and not this, there’s nothing to worry about; but if you remember everything else and forget this, then you will have done nothing in your life.

It’s as if a king has sent you to some country to do a task, and you perform a hundred other services, but not the one he sent you to do. So human beings come to this world to perform particular work. That work is the purpose, and each is specific to the person. If you don’t do it, it’s as though a priceless Indian sword were used to slice rotten meat. It’s a golden bowl being used to cook turnips, when one filing from the bowl could buy a hundred suitable pots. It’s a knife of the finest tempering nailed into a wall to hang things on.

You say, ‘But look, I’m using the dagger. It’s not lying idle.’ Do you hear how ludicrous that sounds? For a penny, an iron nail could be bought to serve the purpose. You say, ‘But I spend my energies on lofty enterprises. I study jurisprudence and philosophy and logic and astronomy and medicine and all the rest.’ But consider why you do those things. They are all branches of yourself.

Remember the deep root of your being, the presence of your lord. Give your life to the one who already owns your breath and your moments. If you don’t, you will be exactly like the man who takes a precious dagger and hammers it into his kitchen wall for a peg to hold his dipper gourd. You’ll be wasting valuable keenness  and foolishly ignoring your dignity and purpose.

(From The Teachings of Rumi edited by Andrew Harvey.)

~

~

~

Thea is author of the inspiring memoir Running into Myself. Buy a copy from Amazon UK, Amazon US or, better still, order a limited edition signed copy direct from her publisher here (also ships worldwide).

Thea’s personal journey is utterly compelling. I couldn’t put her book down. Thea manages to make Greek mythology not only understandable, interesting, and relevant to our lives today, but shows how it can be utilised as a tool for self development. She introduces ideas and ways of thinking that broaden your mind, and lights the way for others to follow.”

— Melinda Messenger (TV Presenter)

June 20, 2010

Running into Myself: A Journey Through the Soul of the Feat – Preface

The following excerpt is taken from Urban Deva founder, Thea Euryphaessa’s recently released memoir Running into Myself: A Journey Through the Soul of the Feat. If you’re a fan of Eat Pray LoveElizabeth Gilbert’s international best-seller and soon-to-be motion picture starring Julia Roberts, or Clarissa Pinkola Estés’ now classic New York Times best-seller Women Who Run with the Wolves, we recommend this incredible true story of one woman’s rite of passage from girl- to womanhood.

Limited edition signed copies of the book are available to buy direct from the publisher here (also ships overseas). The book is also available in the United States at Amazon.com.

Preface (Return with the Elixir)

I am telling myself the story of my life, stranger than song or fiction.

- Paddy McAloon, I Trawl the Megahertz


This book is an attempt to disentangle my destiny from my fate. It’s about a long-overdue, threshold-crossing to womanhood. And it marks The Return – the third and final stage of my initiation, fulfilling an old agreement made with my soul. It’s not a book about running. I run, yes, but that’s not the point of this book. In fact, there is no particular ‘point.’ Points seem contrived, convenient and conclusive. And my journey has been anything but.

Oftentimes the only way to make sense of a life and give it meaning is to share it within the context of a story. Some are supremely gifted at this. They have a knack, make it look easy. I wish this had been so for me. Composing this book has been a painstaking process, demanding all my mental and emotional resources.

I enjoy writing. After dancing, it’s my most natural means of self-expression. But it’s a means to an end. My focus is to nurture the soul and live an authentic life. To help do this I write – not to be creative, but to express energy. Writing helps mirror myself to myself; it provides a container in which the transformative process can unfold, a way to track and trace the soul’s meanderings.

Once thoughts, images and intuitions are on the page, I sort through them, hold them up to the light for reflection, turn them over in my mind. Like dreams, they don’t always make sense – at least not immediately. They can be vague, indecisive and contrary. I also find the flat, one-dimensional nature of words frustrating. They restrict and rigidify. They’re inadequate at expressing the fullness and ambiguity of a human life. But they intrigue and enchant me all the same. And so I keep writing.

Further challenges involve my perfectionist tendencies. I like everything just so. I much prefer writing essays. That way, I can retain absolute control over a piece, stay on point. So to make the leap to the rambling expanse of a book exposes my weaknesses and shortcomings as a writer. In composing this book I’ve had to accept my work can never be perfect. I often lose my way, veer off track – a humbling process mirroring the soul’s journey as it grows down and takes root within the limitations of a human life.

Then there are those whose fate has entwined with mine. There’s an old saying in alchemy: As Without, So Within. I believe those with whom we interact are outer reflections of an inner psychic process. Because of this emotional entanglement, I know my perspective will be distorted. To compensate, I try to be as honest as possible about my version of events. If I’ve been petulant, infantile or provoking, I’ll say so. Sometimes emotions may get the better of me and I’ll speculate about others’ behavioural patterns and traits. But for the most part, I rein it in.

So this book is a story within stories, a life within Life. Life that does not run in an orderly, linear fashion, but spirals, backtracks, spins off at tangents and raises more questions than it answers. Not everything will be boxed off and neatly concluded by the end of the book. Along the way I share pivotal moments, hopes and dreams, setbacks and journal entries. There are mythological ideas, psychological theories and spiritual concepts. These may not always make sense. As the quote above says, I’m telling myself the story of my life. So if I labour a point or circle an issue, it’s more a frustrated attempt to clarify my soul’s nebulous, inarticulate messages, to ascertain a pattern, extricate meaning.

This book also reflects the organic process of a life’s unfolding and becoming. Intuition tells me this is a book within books, a springboard – an opportunity to share, and discuss. Not all of my thoughts and ideas are carved in stone. Many are ephemeral. But I don’t have time to wait until they’re fully formed – my soul demands expression now.

In tribal cultures, when an initiate returns home after a quest they’re expected to share their experiences. That’s because the lessons learnt aren’t strictly for the individual but for the benefit of the group. As the initiate tells their story, the story takes on a life of its own, its essence revealed. People don’t think of stories as having souls. But the soul manifests as the kinks and knotty imperfections – the seeming irregularities that perplex so many. In our ‘plastic fantastic.’ high-speed modern culture, we’ve lost touch with the soul. We’re uncomfortable with it. In many cases we’re afraid of it. And so we rampantly edit, refine and process until nothing remains but a soulless shell. But grainy mishaps highlight our humanness. They add warmth, remind us of our imperfection. They expose the vulnerability involved in the process of creativity, the struggle of a complicated, multifaceted soul seeking expression.

My decision to self-publish honours the soul’s wrinkles and knotty irregularities. I didn’t want the book’s essence to be extracted in the centrifuge of profit-driven publishing  or shoe-horned into an unnatural shape, its soul contaminated and diluted by the uninitiated opinions of others. I wasn’t willing to compromise. As the song says:

I’ll go it alone, that’s how it must be

I can’t be right for somebody else

If I’m not right for me

I gotta  be free, I’ve just gotta be free

Daring to try, to do it or die

I’ve gotta be me.

-Walter Marks, I’ve Gotta Be Me

And so I follow my soul as it sets out its stall in the early chapters. I watch as it introduces itself and reiterates statements time and again before gradually relaxing into the story. Sometimes I cringe at its audacious, naive, bombastic nature. I ponder its uptight, defensive, secretive tendencies. Other times I grow bored with its incessant ramblings, wonder where it’s going. But all the while I stay with it, try to honour its paradoxical, elusive essence as best I can.

So I encourage the reader to relax and not to get too hung up or too bogged down in my mercurial meanderings. As psychologist Carl Jung says in his memoir Memories, Dreams, Reflections, ‘I can only make direct statements, only “tell stories.” Whether or not the stories are “true” is not the problem. The only question is whether what I tell is my fable, my truth.’

(Thea Euryphaessa is hereby identified as the author of this work in accordance with Section 77 of the Copyright, Designs and Patent Act 1988.)

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