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August 20, 2012

The Great Round of Transformation

Filed under: Life Coaching,Personal Thoughts,Psychology,Reconnect with Oneself,Running into Myself: A Journey Through the Soul of the Feat — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , — urbandeva @ 2:34 pm

The Great Round of Transformation

By Thea Euryphaessa

When I started out life coaching ten years ago and sat down in front of my first real-life client, I was immediately struck by how little I really knew about personal transformation ― it’s one thing wanting to help others change their lives; it’s quite another to traverse that precarious trajectory yourself, razing your life to the ground and turning your psyche inside-out so you can sort through the, often gory, frequently baffling viscera.

The enormity of what I was attempting hit me with a resounding humility. No matter how much I wanted to help, no matter how hard I’d studied, how many books I’d read, I knew I didn’t have the depth of experience to hold up against the weight of my clients’ hopes and fears. Not that I could change their lives for them ― I’ve never professed to be able to do that for anyone, nor would I ever. If you want to change any aspect of your life only you can do it, only for yourself, and only when you’re ready.

But it was this sense of inadequacy that eventually drove me to seek an inside-out, bottom-up transformation in my own life ― a cycle of growth which, ten years on, is still very much ongoing. Some days I wonder why the hell I ever started. But, in a way, I’m glad I feel like that; because that’s the reality of consciously committing to personal growth ― it’s damn hard work. Navigating my own ongoing voyage of self-discovery has lent me a more realistic, more compassionate, more patient insight into just what it takes to fulfil your potential and ‘live your essence out’ in a world that often feels as though it’s attempting to thwart you at every turn.

What has helped, though, is constantly observing, recording, and reflecting not just on my life, but on the lives of others who are either being dragged, or walking as best they can, from one life level to another ― hopefully one that’s more conscious, more vital, and more fulfilling. It’s these observations, along with my personal experience and ongoing studies, that have helped me identify the real life archetype of the Hero’s Journey: an initiatory cycle of transformation consisting of three main stages ― Separation, Initiation (or Ordeal), and Return or Life, Death, Rebirth ― that both threads through and circumscribes every metamorphosis that’s ever been.

I say ‘real life’ as when I first encountered Joseph Campbell’s book The Hero With a Thousand Faces, I thought this archetype was reserved for other people, ‘out there’, on the cinema screen, say; exceptional individuals whose stories have been laid down in the annals of myth, weaved into legends we modern mortals could only ever hope to aspire to. But it turns out that’s not the case at all.

What I’ve gradually come to understand is this is a living, breathing, dynamic archetype that becomes increasingly tangible the further you follow it, with each stage emerging and crystallising through the events and circumstances of one’s life. But it’s only with time and ongoing reflection that you begin to feel its outline, behold the shadow it casts.

At the end of my first book, Running into Myself, I was aware I still faced the third and final stage of this great round of transformation ― the Return. I intuited it’d be tough and said as much in the closing chapter. What I didn’t know was just how tough the final stage would be or how long it would last.

I’m a spirited, steadfast so-and-so, underscored by a strength that, at times, has surprised even me. But these past three-and-three-quarter years (my book ends in January 2009) have proved the most challenging of the last ten years by far. It was one thing being forged in the fiery physicality of three gruelling Marathons; it’s been quite another to be psychically dismembered, endure long periods without so much as a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of, and make what’s seemed like sacrifice after heartbreaking sacrifice across all areas of my life. No wonder those familiar with the archetype of the Hero’s Journey remark on the Return phase as being the most difficult, the stage where most throw in the towel and slide back down the proverbial snake to square one ― they weren’t kidding.

No wonder they call it the Hero’s Journey.

Click here to read Part Two

:::

To buy a copy of Running into Myself, visit Amazon UK, Amazon US or, better still, order a limited edition signed copy direct from her publisher here (also ships worldwide). Also available to download on Kindle.

“Thea’s personal journey is utterly compelling. I couldn’t put her book down. Thea manages to make Greek mythology not only understandable, interesting, and relevant to our lives today, but shows how it can be utilised as a tool for self development. She introduces ideas and ways of thinking that broaden your mind, and lights the way for others to follow.”

— Melinda Messenger (TV Presenter)

“This is a story that truly reveals its author. You’ll discover her beliefs, her flaws, her loves, her fears, her mistakes, her drive and her compassion.

And you’ll like her.”

— Rowena Roberts (Writer)

May 31, 2011

Inspire: Quotes

Filed under: Inspiring Quotes,Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , — urbandeva @ 2:16 pm

Inspire: Quotes


It is time to speak your Truth. Create your community, be good to each other. And do not look outside yourself for the leader. This could be a good time! There is a river flowing now very fast. It is so great and swift that there are those who will be afraid. They will try to hold onto the shore. They will feel they are being torn apart and will suffer greatly. Know the river has its own destination. The Elders say we must let go of the shore, push off into the middle of the river, keep our eyes open and our heads above water. And I say, see who is in there with you and celebrate.

— Prayer of the Hopi Elders


Make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservation, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun. If you want to get more out of life, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty.

— Jon Krakauer (Into the Wild)



Every day we slaughter our finest impulses. That is why we get a heartache when we read those lines written by the hand of a master and recognise them as our own, as the tender shoots which we stifled because we lacked the faith to believe in our own powers, our own criterion of truth and beauty. Every man, when he gets quiet, when he becomes desperately honest with himself, is capable of uttering profound truths. We all derive from the same source. There is no mystery about the origin of things. We are all part of creation, all kings, all poets, all musicians; we have only to open up, only to discover what is already there.

— Henry Miller


Deep within the individual is a vast reservoir of untapped power awaiting to be used. No person can have the use of all this potential until he learns to know his or her own self. The trouble with many people is that they got through life thinking and writing themselves off as ordinary commonplace persons. Having no proper belief in themselves they live aimless and erratic lives largely because they never realise what their lives really can be or what they can become.

— Norman Vincent Peale


Ideally, what should be said to every child, repeatedly, throughout his or her school life is something like this: ‘You are in the process of being indoctrinated. We have not yet evolved a system of education that is not a system of indoctrination. We are sorry, but it is the best we can do. What you are being taught here is an amalgam of current prejudice and the choices of this particular culture. The slightest look at history will show how impermanent these must be. You are being taught by people who have been able to accommodate themselves to a regime of thought laid down by their predecessors. It is a self-perpetuating system. Those of you who are more robust and individual than others will be encouraged to leave and find ways of educating yourself — educating your own judgements. Those that stay must remember, always, and all the time, that they are being moulded and patterned to fit into the narrow and particular needs of this particular society.

— Doris Lessing (The Golden Notebook)



Responsibility to yourself means refusing to let others do your thinking, talking, and naming for you… it means that you do not treat your body as a commodity with which to purchase superficial intimacy or economic security; for our bodies to be treated as objects, our minds are in mortal danger. It means insisting that those to whom you give your friendship and love are able to respect your mind. It means being able to say, with Charlotte Bronte’s Jane Eyre: “I have an inward treasure born with me, which can keep me alive if all the extraneous delights should be withheld or offered only at a price I cannot afford to give.”

(more…)

February 18, 2011

The Quickening

Filed under: Personal Thoughts,Reconnect with Nature — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — urbandeva @ 6:27 pm

The Quickening


This morning (08:36 UT) saw the full moon, also known as the Quickening Moon. According to information sourced from Druid Network’s website, the Quickening Moon only comes once every four years. At each of these moons we review the past seven years:

“The reason for this is that every seven years we have renewed through regeneration every cell in our bodies. The new may be crafted by the instructions of the old, but change, healing, adaptation make significant alterations.

Spend time through this moon considering and writing a review of the past seven years, thinking about the physical changes that have happened in your life, and the emotional and spiritual journey that you have been walking. When you have done it, check what you retain in your life that is older than seven years. Is it necessary to keep it? How long is the visible and tangible trail you are leaving (dragging) behind you? Make sure that you release what can be released. Make sure you are living with as much freedom as you can.”

Elsewhere, however, February’s full moon is apparently always known as the Quickening Moon. Jeanette Leblanc on her blog, Crunchy (On the Inside), has this to say about  it:

“The full moon in February is known as the Quickening moon, it marks the official end of winter, and the quickening, the renewal of all things. While the skies are still grey, and the weather is cold, beneath the surface life begins to secretly stir. This moon phase is a time of abundance, ripening and completeness, heavy with fertility and female divinity. It is a time when the potential of all things begins to stir towards birth in spring, a time to work on our own inner power and confront personal truths in preparation for birth. This moon sheds enough light to help us see into our darkness, so that our energy can make its way to the surface to prepare for growth and healing.”

Regardless of whether it’s once every four years or every February, I find both of the above statements interesting. Just last night, during my regular four mile power-walk, I got the strange feeling something was afoot… but couldn’t quite put my finger on what: like the calm before the storm or something. It was cold and the sky was cloudy (so no viewings of the Aurora Borealis — boo), but nevertheless, despite straying no farther than the streets of my local village and neighbouring town, the feeling of anticipation and expectation was so palpable, it bordered on the eerie.

As a long-time outdoor exerciser I’ve grown particularly sensitive to the changes in the seasons. It’s so subtle, so imperceptible, however, that it’s nigh on impossible trying to explain to sedentary folk who spend their lives cooped up indoors in front of the telly that the quality of light or air has changed indicating a shift in the seasons and cycles of Nature — spring isn’t only marked by a gradual lengthening of the days.

So it made a lot of sense to me, this morning, reading about the Quickening Moon; because that’s exactly how I’d describe what I felt last night — a quickening. Change was quite literally afoot as I glanced down and spied crocuses, hyacinths, and other springtime flowers bursting forth in gardens and along verges.

The first quote feels particularly relevant, however, as I moved into my first house on Friday 13 February 2004 in what marked a new chapter in my life (although I didn’t see it like that at the time — I was heartbroken, depressed, and somewhat chubby around the edges). Being honest, I forgot all about this (the date I moved into my house) until I started writing this post. Scary how time flies. I’d split up with my boyfriend not long before Christmas (or rather, he split up with me) and just qualified as a life-coach. I had no idea what direction my life would take. All I knew was things had to change.

So it seems appropriate and timely for me, today, to reflect on my experiences of the past seven years, much of which I share at length in my book. Back then, I was a lost soul with no substance, no sense of self, no inner core. Didn’t know where I was headed, how life would turn out. I was trying my best to move forwards, but all the while my insecurities and unconscious wounds kept dragging me back, dragging me down. They were dark days. But something kept me going. God knows what.

So I’m rather hoping today’s Quickening Moon, these next seven years, marks a new phase in my life. Unlike the insecure lost soul back then, I’m ready for new challenges and adventures. Unlike the insecure lost soul I once was, I’ve found my footing, walk taller than I did back then. I just hope I have the strength, courage, and stamina to continue along this all-too-often precarious path, be true to my deep Self and fulfil my destiny with all the grace I can muster.

:::

One final note: I received an email this morning via my website. At first I wasn’t sure what to make of it, initially finding it creepy (stalker-ish, if the truth be told) and even mocking it on Twitter. (I think partly because I don’t know my father, so found it a little offensive — although I doubt the sender intended it to be.) But throughout the day I’ve kept going back to it, mulling over it, reflecting upon it. Now, I actually find it quite moving if I read it as poetry rather than prose; approach it in terms of its connotation rather than its denotation.

I’m descended from West African tribes-people who innately know there’s more to life than meets the eye. Let’s just say that I, and my family, have had more than our fair share of inexplicable and somewhat strange (for want of a better word) experiences over the years.

So last night, before I fell asleep, I had a chat with my ancestors, asked for some guidance on a particular matter that’s recently weighed heavy on my heart. More often than not, I receive feedback in the form of dreams; a song on the radio; an ‘out-of-the-blue’ comment from a stranger: which is why something tells me that, whatever the ego-oriented (read: conscious) motivations of the sender, there’s more to this message than meets the eye…

Whoever sent it please don’t answer this or say anything else — I just wanted to say, ‘Thank You’:

Thea, My Child,

~

You may not know me,

but I know everything about you.

Psalm 139:1

~

I know when you sit down and when you rise up.

Psalm 139:2

~

I am familiar with all your ways.

Psalm 139:3

~

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered.

Matthew 10:29-31

~

For you were made in my image.

Genesis 1:27

~

In me you live and move and have your being.

Acts 17:28

~

For you are my offspring.

Acts 17:28

~

I knew you even before you were conceived.

Jeremiah 1:4-5

~

I chose you when I planned creation.

Ephesians 1:11-12

~

You were not a mistake,

for all your days are written in my book.

Psalm 139:15-16

~

I determined the exact time of your birth

and where you would live.

Acts 17:26

~

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Psalm 139:14

~

I knit you together in your mother’s womb.

Psalm 139:13

~

And brought you forth on the day you were born.

Psalm 71:6

~

I have been misrepresented

by those who don’t know me.

John 8:41-44

~

I am not distant and angry,

but am the complete expression of love.

1 John 4:16

~

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you.

1 John 3:1

~

Simply because you are my child

and I am your Father.

1 John 3:1

~

I offer you more than your earthly father ever could.

Matthew 7:11

~

For I am the perfect father.

Matthew 5:48

~

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand.

James 1:17

~

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs.

Matthew 6:31-33

~

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope.

Jeremiah 29:11

~

Because I love you with an everlasting love.

Jeremiah 31:3

~

My thoughts toward you are countless

as the sand on the seashore.

Psalms 139:17-18

~

And I rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

~

I will never stop doing good to you.

Jeremiah 32:40

~

For you are my treasured possession.

Exodus 19:5

~

I desire to establish you

with all my heart and all my soul.

Jeremiah 32:41

~

And I want to show you great and marvellous things.

Jeremiah 33:3

~

If you seek me with all your heart,

you will find me.

Deuteronomy 4:29

~

Delight in me and I will give you

the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4

~

For it is I who gave you those desires.

Philippians 2:13

~

I am able to do more for you

than you could possibly imagine.

Ephesians 3:20

~

For I am your greatest encourager.

2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

~

I am also the Father who comforts you

in all your troubles.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

~

When you are broken-hearted,

I am close to you.

Psalm 34:18

~

As a shepherd carries a lamb,

I have carried you close to my heart.

Isaiah 40:11

~

One day I will wipe away

every tear from your eyes.

Revelation 21:3-4

~

And I’ll take away all the pain

you have suffered on this earth.

Revelation 21:3-4

~

I am your Father, and I love you

even as I love my son, Jesus.

John 17:23

~

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed.

John 17:26

~

He is the exact representation of my being.

Hebrews 1:3

~

He came to demonstrate that I am for you,

not against you.

Romans 8:31

~

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.

2 Corinthians 5:18-19

~

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.

2 Corinthians 5:18-19

~

His death was the ultimate expression

of my love for you.

1 John 4:10

~

I gave up everything I loved

that I might gain your love.

Romans 8:31-32

~

If you receive the gift of my son Jesus,

you receive me.

1 John 2:23

~

And nothing will ever separate you

from my love again.

Romans 8:38-39

~

Come home and I’ll throw the biggest party

heaven has ever seen.

Luke 15:7

~

I have always been Father,

and will always be Father.

Ephesians 3:14-15

~

My question is…

Will you be my child?

John 1:12-13

~

I am waiting for you.

Luke 15:11-32

~

Love, Your Dad

Almighty God

:::

Thea is author of the inspiring memoir Running into Myself. Buy a copy from Amazon UK, Amazon US or, better still, order a limited edition signed copy direct from her publisher here (also ships worldwide).

“Thea’s personal journey is utterly compelling. I couldn’t put her book down. Thea manages to make Greek mythology not only understandable, interesting, and relevant to our lives today, but shows how it can be utilised as a tool for self development. She introduces ideas and ways of thinking that broaden your mind, and lights the way for others to follow.”

— Melinda Messenger (TV Presenter)

February 15, 2011

The Real Work (Rumi)

Filed under: poetry — Tags: , , , , , , , , — urbandeva @ 2:19 pm

The Real Work (Rumi)

There is one thing in this world you must never forget to do. If you forget everything else and not this, there’s nothing to worry about; but if you remember everything else and forget this, then you will have done nothing in your life.

It’s as if a king has sent you to some country to do a task, and you perform a hundred other services, but not the one he sent you to do. So human beings come to this world to perform particular work. That work is the purpose, and each is specific to the person. If you don’t do it, it’s as though a priceless Indian sword were used to slice rotten meat. It’s a golden bowl being used to cook turnips, when one filing from the bowl could buy a hundred suitable pots. It’s a knife of the finest tempering nailed into a wall to hang things on.

You say, ‘But look, I’m using the dagger. It’s not lying idle.’ Do you hear how ludicrous that sounds? For a penny, an iron nail could be bought to serve the purpose. You say, ‘But I spend my energies on lofty enterprises. I study jurisprudence and philosophy and logic and astronomy and medicine and all the rest.’ But consider why you do those things. They are all branches of yourself.

Remember the deep root of your being, the presence of your lord. Give your life to the one who already owns your breath and your moments. If you don’t, you will be exactly like the man who takes a precious dagger and hammers it into his kitchen wall for a peg to hold his dipper gourd. You’ll be wasting valuable keenness  and foolishly ignoring your dignity and purpose.

(From The Teachings of Rumi edited by Andrew Harvey.)

~

~

~

Thea is author of the inspiring memoir Running into Myself. Buy a copy from Amazon UK, Amazon US or, better still, order a limited edition signed copy direct from her publisher here (also ships worldwide).

“Thea’s personal journey is utterly compelling. I couldn’t put her book down. Thea manages to make Greek mythology not only understandable, interesting, and relevant to our lives today, but shows how it can be utilised as a tool for self development. She introduces ideas and ways of thinking that broaden your mind, and lights the way for others to follow.”

— Melinda Messenger (TV Presenter)

August 11, 2010

A Psalm of Life

Filed under: poetry — Tags: , , , , — urbandeva @ 11:55 am

Tell me not in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream!
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.
~
Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou are, to dust thou returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.
~
Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each tomorrow
Find us farther than today.
~
Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.
~
In the world’s broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle!
Be a hero in the strife!
~
Trust no Future, howe’er pleasant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act, – act in the living Present!
Heart within, and God o’erhead!
~
Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sand of time;
~
Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o’er life’s solenm main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.
~
Let us then be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

— Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

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